Winter Frolic outhouse race season nearThe outhouse racing season is upon us, you can smell it in the air.
To the Editor:
The outhouse racing season is upon us, you can smell it in the air.
Racers around the area are busily prepping their outhouses for maximum speed as you read this. Our elves at Silver Creek Signworks are busily carving this year’s entry from the finest materials from the polar ice cap.
If you have a grudge or a desire to know just who is better, issue an Outhouse Challenge, and settle it Feb. 9 at the Burlington Bay race track.
Who's got the fastest tellers, Wells Fargo or the Credit Union? Custom painted outhouses--Danny's Auto or TH Auto?
Just who does have the best accessories for your outhouse, NAPA or Auto Value?
Are nurses immune-no, hospital verses the clinic.
Settle once and for all who's best, Bethlehem or Emanuel. Pastor Dennis, put a little magic in your entry.
Who's the most stubborn, Norwegians or Swedes? Finlanders?
Politicians--need I say more, they are used to talking it--let’s see them push: city council versus the school board.
How about the people that put the outhouse out of business, plumbers--Cavallin versus Cavallin, it’s a natural.
Just which is best, Chevy or Ford?
Animal versus animal, (Moose Lodge versus Lion's Club).
How about the kids up Highway 2 at the high school? Girls versus boys basketball, choir versus the drama club, the hockey team versus the lunch ladies.
Just what is a better winter sport? Ski club versus the snowmobile club.
You get the idea, it’s all in fun, life is too short not to have raced an outhouse. If you can build it you can race it. Don't let the paper work scare you, visit www.twoharborschamber.com for race rules and entry form. Don't have the stomach to race an outhouse? Well. strap on an 8-foot 2X4 and take in the Smoosh race. Grab your tobaggon and race down the sledding hill.
Talk quietly as you take a horse drawn sleigh ride through the campground. Enter your old snowmobile in the Vintage Snowmobile Ride.
Carve an ice sculpture, play boot hockey, catch a prize-winning fish, drink hot chocolate by a huge bonfire and shake a leg at the Community Center.
It's all happening at the Two Harbors Winter Frolic, Feb.7-10. It’s all in fun!
Professional Outhouse Racer Extraordinaire
Two Harbors Winter Frolic Chairman